GREAT SINGAPORE SALE !!!!!

At long last, the SALE is here. It's gonna be so much more fun this year since I have lotsa things to get for my new place. Got this in email today, I wonder what the sender of the email was trying to say to me..

Man's Guide to Shopping
Extracted from the Husband's Survival Manual, Chapter 7 - Preparing One's Self for a Shopping Expedition.



1) Remember, for women, shopping is something to do. For men, shopping is something to get done. Women shop. Men raid.

2) Learn the art of self-hypnosis. Attaining an ambulatory catatonic state will make the time go by a lot faster.

3) Shopping locations are like watering holes. Women congregate there. If you stalk out long enough, you may get some good sightings at least.

4) Do not, I repeat, do not immerse yourself in a room of women in full shopping fever. This is like rolling around on the floor of a slaughterhouse and then taking a dip in the midst of a shark feeding frenzy. The potential for collateral damage is too high.

5) Do not come between a woman and her prey (anything marked "sale" or "50% off").

6) Listen to a tape reciting the words "cute" and "adorable" over and over again until you can no longer hear the words. This will prepare you for trips where baby clothing or clothing for little girls is to be purchased.

7) Get used to it: women comprise only 50% of the population, but they own 80% of the clothes and buy 90% of the remaining 20%. Make that 99% if talking about underwear.

8) There is no such thing as "too many shoes."

9) Having an item in pink does not preclude having the same item in blue.

10) Do not try to keep pace with a woman in full power shopping mode. You will just burn yourself out. Just hang back in loose trail formation and try close the distance in the turns.

11) Resign yourself to the fact that there is no correct answer to "which one looks better" or "does this make me look fat?"

12) Do not argue with women about color. The average woman can name 1,024 different colors.
The average male knows 8 - those in the basic box of crayolas used in kindergarten.

13) Bring plenty of money.

Hhmm...Could it be that THE DON already has this manual...???